More crosses.

Somehow I felt surprised that it still came as a shock when I learned that my visa had been denied. Redundant, yarr. Anyway, the day after my last post I got the visa application result, and yeah, I’ve been denied. Did I say that I was silently asking for it? My gosh, this is one answered prayer that I actually felt sad upon receiving. Confusing, huh? Well, now that I have thought and prayed about it over and over again, I realized that humanly speaking, I’m sad–for all the efforts, resources, and expectations that were “wasted”. Of course, I was also excited, although cramming for trips never fails to give me migraines. However, supernaturally speaking, I perfectly understand. And I am really amazed that God really gave me the “sign” that I was asking for. Plus it perfectly fit the criteria of a “sign”–the probability of it occurring is next to nil. Actually, it still puzzles me as to how I got rejected, knowing that my bank account is not that minimal. And that I worked hard for all the credible supporting documents which I submitted. Yeah yeah, somehow I’m still not over it. But I understand that it is not yet The Time. God’s ways may be mysterious but I want to want what He wants. And again, I had been given a cross with which I must remember three things:

1. A much better plan has been prepared–either immediately visible or inconceivable (Lord, please sana mayfull  scholarship na ako!).

2. This minor bump will give me strength and courage to face even greater trials. I know that nothing can really prepare me for that one thing which I’m afraid of. But I know I need to constantly work on acquiring greater faith. God doesn’t allow anything which we are not ready for.

3. Crosses are meant to unite myself with Christ’s redemption, to master myself more, and to be more close to Him.

At saka haller, ang dami damiiiiiiii ko pa talagang tatapusing “work” dito. As in. Yarr.

Thank you, Lord. Please help me recover soon And get a high-paying job (haha abuso na yata).